Category Archives: Mindfulness

Living a life of mindfulness involves a gentle inquiry into gratitude, simplicity, meditation, awareness, and using your curiosity and wonder to guide you.

How you move through the day

There are two days. They look relatively similar:

The first one I wake up, stress in my blood, anxious, making coffee, urgently filling up my water bottle, spilling a little on the counter. I go through the motions, minute to minute, chasing the work. I record a few podcast episodes, I ship all the essays that need to go out the door, I answer all the emails (okay, that never happens), but you get the picture.

The second one, I wake up, I breathe. I exhale. I make the coffee (or tea). I take a few extra seconds, maybe sixty seconds total, to move from the bedroom to the kitchen. I still do the same amount of work, the podcast recordings, and the essays—but my demeanor, posture, and relaxation are completely different.

How you do it is just as important as what you do

There are many ways to go about a day. It’s not always as important what gets done as it is how I am and who I’m being in the process of all the doing and non-doing that I’m engaged in.

In my mastermind circles, we call this “ways of being.”

We work through three major phases and processes:

  1. Reflections—harvesting lessons from past experiences.
  2. Planning—setting goals, intentions, and measurements for the future.
  3. Being—sharing who we want to be and how we want to show up in our life.

In my experience, we all can adopt goal setting processes and tools. But it’s one thing to set a plan and accomplish it, and make yourself miserable throughout the entire experience.

What’s missing, for me, is the question: who do you want to be while you’re journeying there?

How do you want to feel? What kind of person do you want to be in the moments that lead up to the experience? The cliche about the journey being as important as the destination is apt, here.

For example: I want to write, and I want to feel satisfied, spent, and accomplished while doing it. I want to exercise, and I want to feel powerful, at my limit, and strong while doing it.

How do you want to show up in the process of making your work (and your mark) on the world?

Why I am Choosing to Email Slowly

I am by choice a slow emailer, and it often takes me a week or two to respond to messages. Sometimes longer. I think to myself, You do not really want me to be a fast emailer. Why do you want me to email quickly? Do you want me to sit at my desk, furiouslyRead the article

Silence, Stillness, and Returning From Retreat

Last week I left to go to a four-day silent retreat up in the snowy rural woods of central Massachusetts. The retreat was long days of sitting and walking meditations, mindful eating, noble silence, and being in stillness. We were instructed not to journal or read, and we relinquished our cell phones and devices uponRead the article

Our Dying Attention is a Big Problem

Over the bulk of the last year, I’ve been focused on adding meditation, quality, and depth to my life in a meaningful way. That includes: rethinking my relationship to reading, and reading entire books, slowly. With notes. Deepening my ability to focus and pay attention. Putting parental controls on my technology to block social media. Today, I share a round-up of essays that have helped me. Here are 17 essays on attention, anxiety, being over-busy, and why our lack of recharge time is more problematic than we think.Read the article

In Search of Mental Focus and Clarity

Those of you that have followed my posts recently know I’m experimenting with my relationships to social media, email, and the internet. I love tech AND I also want to stay smart about my habits, impulsivity, and addictions. Because make no mistake: tech is an addiction, for sure. How do we achieve mental focus in the increasing onslaught of information? Get this: the average person checks email 74 times per day and spends 28% of their time on email. If we’re not questioning this, we should be concerned.Read the article

Suffering from Burnout? How to Know When to Rest or Push

Does your life plan account for enough rest? How do you know when you should push, and when you’re in burnout and deeply in need of a break? Here’s how to determine the difference.Read the article

Loving Yourself

A friend of mine is having a bit of a rough time right now and I sent her a note to check in. How’s it going, how are you feeling? One of the ways we exist for each other is to confirm and mirror experience. When we notice a friend or a colleague struggling, we canRead the article

50 Things That Make Me Happy

In the free series of writing prompts I put together, one of the prompts is to make a list of 50 things that make you happy. I love lists (they’re one of the things that makes me happy!), and I love using lists as a way to kick-start my writing. It’s not writing, it’s making aRead the article

Should You Worry Now Or Later?

There are so many unknowns coming ahead on the horizon: Will we have a baby that sleeps or a baby that cries non stop? Will I love being a mom or will it be an immense challenge? Will I bond with my kid right away or will it take time? Will breastfeeding be hard orRead the article

The Power of Silence: In Conversation, In Contemplation, In Being

I sometimes think that when I get sick, it’s because I’ve forgotten to listen. I’ve forgotten to listen internally, to my body. I’ve let it get too noisy and not gotten still enough to hear what’s going on. After a cold sets in, I realize that the chatter in my brain has gotten to excessivelyRead the article