How Do You Feel Before, During, and After?

Today I want to share with you about a way to connect inwardly, with yourself. 

But first, a quick story.

I work with coaches. A lot of coaches. I’ve worked with college coaches, swim coaches, book coaches, life coaches… you name it, I like doing it. 

One of my most recent coaches has worked with me on deep, sticky, messy problems, and he consistently challenges me to level up in terms of how I grow. And how I even think about growth in the first place.

Suffice it to say, before our sessions, I start to get really anxious.

I don’t want to meet with him today.

I get a little panicky. I get frustrated. I yell (sometimes). 

“Maybe I’ll just quit coaching,” I tell my husband in a panic. brings a lot of stuff up for me about how I learn, grow 

He laughs at me. Kindly, though. Because I do this every single time.

Right before our sessions together, I start to get frustrated and nervous. I don’t always want to dig into the stuff that needs work.brings a lot of stuff up for me about how I learn, grow 

And then we meet. And we dissect, analyze, and talk through the puzzles that are presenting themselves in my life at the moment. Sometimes I cry.brings a lot of stuff up for me about how I learn, grow 

And afterwards? brings a lot of stuff up for me about how I learn, grow 

Afterwards feels amazing. brings a lot of stuff up for me about how I learn, grow 

Afterwards I am so grateful, and so thankful. brings a lot of stuff up for me about how I learn, grow 

We unpack the stories, the narratives, the ideas, the messiness of mind, and we think about how it all layers together. And there’s relief, and freedom, and … joy. Joy in being human, in being alive, in being messy, in being like a playful little kid, experimenting, growing, and trying things out.

And my husband, he reminds me to remember that how I feel before is not the same as how I feel during, which is not the same as how I feel after.

When you’re feeling sticky or icky, or if you’re in a moment of decision-making, consider all of the layers of the feelings.

  • How do you feel before?
  • How do you feel during? 
  • How do you feel afterwards?

What you feel matters. It’s important to notice all of the feelings, not just some of them.

 


Get my monthly newsletter, not available anywhere else: The SKP Monthly.

Sorry, comments are closed for this post.